February Low.

Must say, Valentine's is the most insipid commercial holiday of the year. Aside from the fact that I hardly think that one day out of 365/ 366 is enough to show your loved ones how very special they are, it is also a day dreaded by most singletons. Sure, give us a reason to feel even more bad about ourselves than we usually do.

Another reason to hate Valentine's is the fact that it makes me feel like a complete hypocrite. Whenever I get asked out on a date for Valentine's, I usually give the same answer: "I'm not a fan. Let's not celebrate it." -- only to feel, days later as this pseudo-holiday looms even closer, slightly depressed with being alone. Make a liar out of me, why don't you?

Nevertheless, I do imagine getting slightly contradicting feelings about February 14th. One, of course, is utter superiority as I look at those lovey-dovey couples holding hands as they give in to all of this stupidity. The other, bitter jealousy at not having romantic feelings for another human being of my own.

I don't know... I guess seeing other people so immersed in someone else just reminds me of the fact that I'm not. Don't get me wrong, I don't think I ever want that for myself - or even capable of feeling such emotion with another person. But there is that longing for wanting something so bad, you have to get off your ass and do something about it - work hard for it - fight for it- which, as you might have guessed, I have not experienced. Essa Pamandanan, love pariah.

Still, I suppose that Valentine's isn't isolated to significant others, per se. One can celebrate it with various things/ people we love. Even while I write this rant, I know that come February 14th, I'll be spending it with one person who truly is special to me. We will have coffee. We will smoke. We will talk. We will laugh.

Sev, I can hardly wait.

Damn you, St. Valentine.