Relationships

Over countless days spent in long conversations with girlfriends complaining and bemoaning men, nitpicking and analyzing every single little detail; where the problem was, what went wrong, I think I've found the answer.

Men aren't the problem, or rather, not entirely the problem. In a culture such as ours, where we demand equality with all, the double standards don't start and end with us women. We've relentlessly shoved back at the media for portraying strong women as shrews and incapable of emotion while allowing men to be successful in both their love lives and careers simultaneously. Yet even as we greedily ask for equality, we wish to preserve and continue the older days of courtship. We want to be wooed. We want romance. We want a grand passion. We want for men to make a great sacrifice as proof of their love and devotion to us. How is it fair that while demanding equality, we also ask for a prince, for lack of a better word; someone to try and win us over? And when the men we pick fail to deliver, we immediately label them as jerks and assholes unworthy of our affection.

How will these men tread the thin chord of treating us equally without crossing over to being chauvinistic? We demand for the same treatment yet take it is a personal attack when we're subjected to a scolding that were it a man in our position, the "scolder" wouldn't have to worry about a harassment case being filed against him.

My point is this, how many times can you expect to tell a man he's being sexist and wrong and idiotic until he finally gives in and stops trying to prove you otherwise? How many times can you expect to tell them something while meaning another thing entirely? We women and our games, expecting to be spoiled and satisfied and satiated at all times, at all costs.

This is unfair, though. The blame isn't entirely on us. More than half the time, we do get it right: Men are scum. Maybe not for the reason we think, but for other unknown reasons as well. They take advantage when they think we won't notice. A few try to bend and subject us to their iron forged will.

The solution: Combat their wills forged of iron with our spines made of steel.

Maybe men and women aren't really soulmates. Maybe our soulmates are our bestfriends and our significant others is just someone you like a little bit more than you like the other members of their gender.

Baffled,

Essa.